4 Self-Care Tips from Successful Beauty & Lifestyle Blogger Mattie James
Thanks to social media, beauty bloggers, fashion experts and self-proclaimed influencers have flourished over the past few years. But what sets Mattie James apart? She does things her own way.
Behind the gorgeous photos, numerous podcast episodes and endless tips you see on her website, Mattie puts one thing first across everything… helping others. As she gives women a glimpse into her everyday life. She’s candid about her struggles and her daily challenges, all while providing as much advice as possible to her loyal readers.
And we got lucky enough to get some of her bomb advice firsthand… read on.
1) PROVE IT TO YOURSELF, FOR YOURSELF
Mattie James: For me, my biggest fear was always what other people thought of me. It was so important to me that people thought I was cool or that I was good enough and I focused on that instead of just doing the work.
I think that in the beginning of any journey -- whether you’re a entrepreneur or getting a new job or starting school -- it is a lot about what other people think of you. But I realized over the next few months and next couple of years after starting my blog that what I thought about myself and the confidence I had in myself determined the kind of work I was going to do much more than me trying to impress somebody else.
I also don’t necessarily like the term “proving” -- it means if somebody validates something, then it is valuable. Proving something to yourself is good, but proving something to everybody else isn’t. I now associate proving with the word ‘impressing’ and I think the goal is more about being impactful; I think it’s more purposeful. You only have to prove yourself to yourself. The only person you should be trying to be better than is yourself, better than who you were yesterday. I think that’s the daily goal. I am definitely smarter, a better blogger, a better businesswoman than I was on January 1 of 2017. And i hope in 2019 I am better than who I was in 2018. It’s less about proving to anyone else and more about being self-assured.
I keep reminding myself that I wouldn't have gotten to this place if I didn't have in me, which allowed me to continue and push through. We really do need that self-affirmation, it’s really important.
2) EMBRACE YOUR “F*CK IT” MOMENTS
Mattie James: I started blogging in 2008 very, very casually as a hobby, which a lot of people don’t know. I won Miss Liberia USA in 2009 and I had a lot more eyes on me. In 2010, I realized this is a platform I should take advantage of.
My parents came to this country because my father got a full scholarship to Ohio State. He was the first one out of his family to go to college. For me, my journey was a little bit different and I let go of what my parents thought. I decided to leave school because I realized I was trying to prove something to my parents as opposed to going to school because I was really passionate about starting a career in a certain field. When I started the blog it was still so new and not a lot of people fully understood it. I was very, very much on my own with this. My husband believed in me and supported me but we didn't really know what it would become. We knew that we wanted it to become something big, and that i definitely had the opportunity to, as long as I kept working at it.
I really had two “f*$k it” moments: One being in 2010, when I started my blog, and the second in 2015, when I was let go from my job. I had been sitting on my hands about whether I should quit and go full time. I was just scared to say “i quit” or justify leaving my good job to do this side project full time. But it ended up being a blessing in disguise. it was a situation that definitely forced me to say “you do have what it takes and now you really have no choice.” These moments are never by accident, they are always purposeful regardless of what you believe in.
3) REMEMBER TO BELIEVE IN YOURSELF
Mattie James: I want people to believe in themselves. I know that sounds cliche but that is something that I really want people to make sure they do. On social media, there are just so many different voices and opinions, and sometimes they can be really toxic. I want to make sure that people are doing whatever it takes to stay grounded and rooted in something that is a solid foundation and inspires them.
4) FAIL HARD. CELEBRATE WINS. YOU’LL BE FINE
Mattie James: My advice to my younger self would be: You’re going to fail. People are not going to like you. You are going to hear the word “no” more than once. You will be more than ok.
When I was younger, I would really take defeat so hard. What I would want my younger self to realize is that defeat, just like success, is temporary. So if you fall on your face, do what it takes to get yourself back up again. And when you do well, get excited and celebrate that moment and keep doing the work. You'll be fine.
You’re going to have hard days. And realize some of the really good days are really hard. But It’s hard because its supposed to be. Being good at what you do and becoming the person you’re supposed to be isn’t easy. Become familiar with that. Push through even when you don’t feel like it.